No Solid Dementia – Alzheimer’s Problems until Recently
Transcribed by Honey B Wackx
Mr. Q’s Background as I know it
Mr. Q has generally been a loner for many years. He was friendly, however, and had many friends over the years, but from what I understand few or maybe none that were really close. He never had any sickness or dementia until this episode.
He is single, has no children, and has never been married. He lived in a big city all his life except for several years when he was in the military overseas. That was over fifty years ago.
There were several children in the family and Mr. Q was the youngest. Most of his close family lived near him and until the past few years he was close to them. He was a teacher and counselor most of his adult life and retired from that profession some twenty years ago. Getting Alzheimer’s disease was the last thing anyone would ever suspect.
About eighteen months ago Mr. Q bought a Condo in a high-rise building. After that time little was seen of him and he always seemed to make excuses why his relatives couldn’t visit him. So little was known about his personal life since that time, and little communication came forth either.
I remember he called me during that time and we had a short conversation. It was riddled with repeated questions I had just answered. It was obvious his memory was not good. But at his age that was not that unusual. I never thought anything about dementia.
Dementia symptoms start to show
During that time his immediate family saw very little of him and when they did they did not think anything was wrong until they saw him in the park wearing multiple sets of clothing on a hot summer day. There were other things too – telltale signs something was not quite right. Eventually it was decided, through a series of incidents, that Mr. Q needed help.
His home State takes control
Somehow a government agency got involved with the situation. He was subsequently examined and it was determined he had dementia plus Alzheimer’s disease. Because of that Mr. Q could no longer live by himself. Unfortunately his home state had gotten involved and now dictates what happens to him.
As I near an end this background info I will just say the State of Mr. Q’s residence got involved and Mr. Q’s fate depends almost entirely on their whims, or rather their convoluted laws and procedures.
It’s bad, but I don’t think they (the state shall remain unnamed) have a monopoly on that since California laws governing what we do in our RCFE (Residential Care Facility for the Elderly) are just as convoluted, unfair, and restrictive in caring for someone like Mr. Q.
The story of Mr. Q’s background has been overshadowed by the power of Mr. Q’s home state. They have almost complete control of him, although he was permitted to be sent to our home to live. That was because everyone in his close family is older than him (he is over eighty years old) and is not in a position to care for him. They selected us to take daily care of him.
Never on any assistance program
Let it be known that Mr. Q is not on welfare or any state or federal assistance program. He never was. Even so, due to unfortunate circumstances, his life is no longer his own.
This is a statement of how much power or control one can lose in cases like Mr. Q’s where the government got involved and the person was almost immediately shutout of his own home, ultimately becoming a ward of the State. That home, where Mr. Q lived, has just been put up for sale – by order of his home state.
My thoughts on …
Now this is my personal opinion, and I will sneak it in here where few may see it, I really don’t think the care of Mr. Q and others who may be admitted into a facility like ours (an RCFE), is very important.
From my personal experience over the past nine years it is very clear to me that the state’s rules (the county is highly involved too) are more important than the care of any person in a facility like ours. That makes it real difficult, if not impossible at times, to give people the care they need.
In fact, due to the almost brute force of their power, people getting perfectly good care can be put out of a facility like ours and have no place to go (if they cannot afford the sometimes thousands of dollars more per month to go to a nursing home or convalescent home.) That could happen if their family cannot take care of them.
Be careful what I say
I won’t go into details as I do not know all the details of Mr. Q’s background and they are rather personal. Mr. Q’s close relatives are not thrilled about me writing this expose so I may be treading in dangerous waters. So if there comes a point I cannot longer expose his situation please understand how you might feel if this highly personal information was divulged about your loved one.
Within these writings is a continuing saga of a once proud professional who has suddenly gone from normal to an advanced case of dementia and who is also diagnosed with Alzheimer’s disease. The story of some of our trials and tribulations are described within the writing you see here regarding Mr. Q.
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